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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/25915564">One Love Spans Lifetimes</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/SpaceBunBun/pseuds/SpaceBunBun'>SpaceBunBun</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>M/M</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-08-15</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-08-15</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-05 03:06:55</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Major Character Death</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>9,649</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/25915564</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/SpaceBunBun/pseuds/SpaceBunBun</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff"><p>I got to participate in the Sylvix Big Bang with radeeum and I really enjoyed participating in this bang with them! It was really fun and they drew some really lovely and amazing art for this! Also, the lovely ava-artist14 on tumblr beta read this for me!</p><p>Here is the art that was drawn by the lovely radeeum: https://twitter.com/radeeum/status/1294665750683164672</p></div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Felix Hugo Fraldarius/Sylvain Jose Gautier</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>2</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>9</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Collections:</b></td><td>Sylvix Big Bang</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>One Love Spans Lifetimes</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>It had only been months since the war had ended. It had only been months since Sylvain had inherited his title as Margrave. That was the last time he had seen his dearest friend...his love, Felix. He knew that he would leave. Not that he could blame him, with no prince...without their childhood friend, there wasn’t much of a reason to stay. And with no father to have pride in him, what was the point? It was only natural for him to become a mercenary, Sylvain could only wonder what would have happened if the Professor didn’t persuade the two of them into their class. One could only wonder. </p><p>Sylvain walked through Fhirdiad markets, making his way towards a flower shop. Due to Faerghus’ harsh winter conditions, it was always hard to grow flowers. But when spring came, and when the weather was warmer, people were able to plant some pretty flowers. There were a bunch that caught his eye. He knew they all had a meaning to them. He kept looking around until he found a mixture of flowers that he liked. Sylvain walked to the graveyard in the forest behind the castle. There were two graves he stood in front of. </p><p>“Mercedes von Martritz” </p><p>“Dimitri Alexandre Blaiddyd”</p><p>He placed Amaranth Globes, Plumerias, and Gardenias on both of their graves. He knew that they loved each other. He knew that. Everyone knew that. They would do anything for each other, much like how he would do anything for Felix. Sylvain looked at his left hand. He wore a gold wedding band. It was something Felix promised him. To be married in the midst of a war, it was crazy. Sylvain laughed. The two were crazy enough to do it. He loved Felix so much, but he knew that he couldn’t stay idle forever. He knew that he would come home to him eventually. When exactly, he never knew. </p><p>Sylvain let out a sigh as he held his hand closer to his lips. “Was it something I said,” he sang. “Was there something I should’ve said.” He breathed. His voice started to quiver as tears started to roll down his face. He wanted to see Felix again. He wanted to see his love. His little Blue Giggle. “I miss your eyes, your smile,” he sighed. “I miss your laugh.” </p><p>Felix felt the cold rain drop onto his face. It had been so long since he had seen his beloved Sylvain. The day he left, the day he renounced his title as a noble, he had been fighting all over Fodlan. It was the only thing he knew he was good at. And with every fight, Sylvain’s words rang in his ears. He couldn’t keep fighting. And when the fighting was done and said, what then? He looked at his hand, looking at his wedding band. He was the one to propose...And the one to leave first. He knew that he was going to be the one to leave first. </p><p>He took a deep breath and exhaled, seeing the cloud of fog. He wanted to go home, but he was needed to stop all of these bandits and fights. He fought day in and day out. Sleeping on the ground and uncomfortable inn beds. It was a different life than the one he grew up with. A house with a comfy bed, meals, and snacks every day, a better promise for another day of life, caring parents, caring friends. Now...Now there was no promise for tomorrow, moving around from inn to inn, no parents, no friends….No Sylvain. He destroyed all the relationships that he had. He destroyed all the relationships people were trying to fix. </p><p>His father, Dimitri, Ingrid, everyone. And...And Sylvain. And the worst part about him, he wouldn’t hold it against him. Felix sniffed. He could imagine his face when he would arrive back home. A smile that would beat the sun. A pure and cheerful smile that would be bigger than the sun. It would be warm, caring. He missed his stupid smile, his stupid heart. He missed him. Felix felt sorrow bubbling into his chest. One day...One day he’ll make it back to Sylvain. One day he’ll make it back home. But today was not the day. </p><p>Felix made his way to an inn, following someone to his room. He looked at it. It was a bit tight but managed to fit a bed, a dresser, and a desk. It was a lot like his room at Garegg Mach. Thanks to this, all of his memories started to flood back to him. The days he spent training, studying, and even the rare days that he had to clean up Sylvain’s messes. Man, was he furious. A small smile appeared on his face as he remembered those days. Oh, how he missed them. </p><p>Felix rummaged through his pouch, grabbing his journal, ink, and owl feather. He sat at his desk, flipping through the book filled with words. He stopped when he found a blank page to write on. He sighed, looking blankly at the page. What was he supposed to write? “I’m sorry?” That wasn’t going to cut it. Felix wrote it plenty of times. How was he going to write this letter to Sylvain? This journal was filled with many others that he tried to write and to send to him. He never did have the courage to send any. He was never good with words, especially ones filled with flowers and love. </p><p>He felt something swell inside. He wrote down whatever he felt was in his heart. He wanted to get everything off his mind...and his chest. Whatever came to mind, he wrote down. No word, no feeling was spared. And with each and every word he wrote, he could feel himself inch closer to crying. It wasn’t like him to do so, but he was in pain. It was only a matter of time where he put down his quill. He covered his face with his hand and started to cry silently. His tears falling onto the pages. </p><p>He woke up late into the night. Felix didn’t even realize he cried himself to sleep. He lit up a few candles, placing them on his desk so he could finish his letter. He took it slow and careful, not wanting to cry again. Even though he was writing, even though he knew he wasn’t going to send this to Sylvain, he could understand why he did it. It just...It just felt right. Maybe him writing the words down felt like Sylvain could feel it in his heart. At the end of the letter, he wrote a song for him. Or added more lyrics to a song that he would sing. </p><p>The next morning, Felix left the inn to finish his trek to Derdriu, the old aquatic capitol to the fallen Leicester Alliance. He was hired to help quell a small rebellion from a bandit group. Nothing too hard. He, and a few others, went to the bandits base. They were smoked out of the building, only leaving them to fight. It didn’t take them more than two hours to defeat these guys and give them a make-shift funeral. After everything was said and done, he took out his journal and started to write to Sylvain about the battle and that he was okay. </p><p>“Whatcha doing there,” one of the soldiers smirked. </p><p>“None of your business,” Felix replied. </p><p>“Writing to your girlfriend,” they teased, ignoring his words. </p><p>“I don’t have a girlfriend,” he sighed in irritation. </p><p>“Oh, your wifey then?” </p><p>He sighed again. “Who I love is none of your business. Quit talking to me.” </p><p>He stormed off, not caring what other ridiculous nonsense that came out of their mouth. He was married to Sylvain. How did they not know that? It wasn’t like they kept it a secret. Surely word about it spread. He shook his head, not putting much more thought into it. It wasn’t like he was going to see the soldier again. He started to walk back to the old Faerghus Kingdom. He had to report back to his employer about this if he wanted to receive some sort of payment. Maybe now he could return back to Sylvain. It had been a long while since he had. </p><p>Sylvain sat in a boring meeting about the New Kingdom of Fodlan. This meeting was just matters of cleaning up the old Adrestian Empire. Why did he have to be a part of this? He had other things to attend to, fixing the Sreng problem that his father left him, and more importantly, worrying about Felix. Where was he? He was supposed to be back by now. The mission he had shouldn’t have taken as long as it was. Either way, Sylvain was still worried that he was in harm's way. He had to remind himself that he was a capable man that he needed to be patient for his beloved to return. He can wait a lifetime for him. He would wait for him in every life that they spent together. </p><p>After the meeting, he talked to Byleth about some policies that they had. It was a short discussion since someone had interrupted them to give Sylvain some information on Felix. His heart became full and warm when he heard he was alive and still kicking. The soldier handed him a journal that Felix wrote in. He smiled as he flipped through the pages of the book. He could feel his heart beat faster as he skimmed some of the words. He knew Felix wasn’t good with words, but he knew each word that he wrote was filled with love. </p><p>He pressed the book against his lips, giving it a kiss before mouthing “I love you, Felix.” Sylvain happily walked out of Garegg Mach, reading some of the things that he said. Some of the words made him laugh, some made him cry, but he wouldn’t ask anything otherwise. He put the journal away so he could get on his horse. It was going to be a long couple of days, but at least he knew that Felix was thinking about him. It made the trek back home a little more bearable. </p><p>Sylvain got back home and rushed to his room, he lit up some candles to help him read the words that Felix left him. He wanted to stay up all night to read as much as he could. Though, it did not work out. He fell asleep an hour after he came home. Within the next few days, and in between reading the journal, Sylvain had meetings with the people in town to get it up and running again. He talked to people in Sreng to see if he could help out with anything. He also made sure to talk to his people, and other powerful lords, about how Crests weren’t that important. He didn’t hate doing these things, nor did he like them, they were just exhausting. With days like these, he wished and hoped that Felix would come home any minute and help him and to talk to him, to help ease the pain. But he waited. He waited as patiently as he could. He waited for him every day. </p><p>Under a lot of stress from the past couple of weeks, Sylvain took it upon himself to take a few days off and take a trip to Fraldarius territory. It wouldn’t be a good idea for him to die so early in life due to stress. Especially not when you promised your husband you would die together. It would just break Felix’s heart to see that he broke his promise. Before he went to Felix’s old house, he stopped at a flower shop to pick some up. After that, it wasn’t long before he was at the Fraldarius family home, and it wasn’t long before he was at their graveyard. Sylvain placed blue violets on Rodrigue’s grave and put blue stars near Glenn’s armour. </p><p>He offered his prayers to them and kept silent afterward. He let the wind do all of the talking. He missed this family. He wanted to be a part of it for as long as he could remember. By the time he was able to, he lost his brother-in-law and on his way to losing his father-in-law. Rodrigue died shortly after the two got married. Felix wouldn’t admit it, but Sylvain knew that he was devastated when he found his father had died. Maybe in another path, he could have lived and that they could be a happy family once more. Once the wind quieted down, Sylvain could hear light footsteps from someone. He stood up to face her. </p><p>“It’s been a long time since I’ve seen you, Sylvain,” she said. </p><p>“A long time indeed, Lady Fraldarius,” he smiled. He walked over to her and handed her some pink carnations. “For you.” </p><p>She smiled, taking the flowers from him. “Thank you.” It was silent for a few seconds so she could offer her own prayers to her son and her beloved husband. “What brings you here?” </p><p>“Paying my respects.” </p><p>“Is that all?” </p><p>Sylvain sighed. “I’m a little stressed right now and I just wanted to get away from everything.” </p><p>“So you come here of all places,” she chuckled. </p><p>“Yeah,” he faintly smiled. “I really miss this place,” he sniffed. </p><p>“I know, dear. It would have been better to have Felix here.” </p><p>“Agreed. I just wish I knew where he was.” </p><p>“He was always an ornery child. He could never sit still.” </p><p>A smile crept upon Sylvain’s face. “That’s too true. He always wanted to do something with me, Dimitri, Glenn, Ingrid. Anyone he got close to.” </p><p>Lady Fraldarius chuckled. “Why don’t you go inside and walk around for a while. Let it bring back the memories.” </p><p>“Thank you,” he said, giving her a kiss on her cheek. </p><p>“Sylvain,” she called out before he went back inside. </p><p>“Yes?” He asked. </p><p>“Wherever Felix is, he will always be in our hearts. And wherever you are, he’ll know you will be there for him. He knows where his home is.” </p><p>Sylvain’s smile grew bigger. Of course, he was, Felix always said that Sylvain was his home and that he would never leave him. He always had been his home. He walked back into the estate, walking through all its rooms and halls. He heard the laughter of children running around the house. It was their laughter. He felt so warm inside. He came across a large room, a room where he would play with Felix. They would fight about toys, they would make up and start to laugh again. Sylvain kept on walking around, making his way to the kitchen. He remembered him and Felix cooking with Lady Faldarius. The faces they would make when his mother would cook something yummy, it was priceless. She was one of the few people in Faerghus that could cook. </p><p>Finally, Sylvain made it to Felix’s old room; the room that he barely left when his brother died. He could remember all of his tears that he cried. He remembered both of their tears. He remembered Felix begging him not to leave him. Not then, not now, not ever. Sylvain sat at his desk and started to read more of the journal. He broke down. He finally broke down. The words he wrote in one entry, who knows how long ago. He could feel those words in every inch of his body. </p><p>“To my dearly beloved Sylvain,” his lips quivered. “I miss you so very dearly, with my whole heart.” He stopped. He took a breath. He wanted to get through the passage, to be able to read his heart. “I love you and all that you are. I wish I could be near you right now, but we both know that’s not possible.” Sylvain’s voice broke into a cry. It took a few minutes to read again. “I miss your red hair, brown eyes, your voice.” He said, breaking through his cry. “I miss all of you. Know that, with every step I take, with every heartbeat that I have, you are always on my mind...and in my heart. Signed your Little Blue Giggle, Felix Hugo Fraldarius.” </p><p>It was hard for him to stop crying after reading the passage. He was being patient as he possibly could with him. He wanted Felix with him now more than ever. Things were stressful enough, but being alone hurt even more. He wiped the last of the tears off of his face before he read over the pages again. He traced his fingers over the pages and felt the places where Felix had cried himself. And on the last page of the entry, he found a song that he wrote for him. It warmed his aching heart. </p><p>“Do you remember all those winter nights,” he smiled. “Sitting by the fire. All those snowball fights.” He tried to sing. He wasn’t great at it, but it was enough for Felix to love. “Do you remember? I watched as you go. All I wanted to do was grow. With you.” He let out a small yawn. “Felix, please come home.” He said before falling asleep at his desk.</p><p>Felix could feel the chill of the air starting to set in. Winter was right around the corner. He spent many winters in Faerghus, and with what he was doing, he spent few winters in Old Alliance territory and they could never compare to the ones he grew up with. He was so close to being home, he was so close. His heart felt heavy with guilt when he realized he lied to Sylvain when he said he would be back home after one more job. It hurt worse when it was never just ‘one’ more job. One more turned into five more, then ten more, then twenty. </p><p>All those sleepless nights made him lose track of time. Fighting bandits made him lose sight of what he really wanted. Moving from inn to inn took a toll on his body. His life was wearing thin and it was starting to show. He needed to rest and feel the warmth and energy from the one he loved. But it was never going to happen. As long as there were bandits, thieves, any horrible person he had to cut down, he was never going to stop fighting. Even if he had lost sight of seeing Sylvain ever again, he always felt an inkling that he would see him again. He had his wedding ring and all of the love letters that were sent to him are with him. He faintly smiled as he walked to his next battle. </p><p>A decade or so have passed and countless love letters from each other, the two were finally set to reunite with one another. In Felix’s cold, almost dead heart, felt a flame burn bright. He knew he could go home anytime, but he felt less guilty going home when he was requested to. He would feel guiltiest if Sylvain didn’t scold him and let the matter drop. Truth was, he would rather that happen than have to face a long scolding from him. He would rather feel his fleeting warmth than face everlasting sorrow.<br/>
Felix held his left hand close to his mouth, kissing his wedding ring in joy. He felt a little warmer inside knowing that he wouldn’t be much longer before returning to Sylvain. He had one more mission he needed to complete beforehand, then he will be home. He couldn’t wait to be home. Maybe this time, he will stay and never leave. </p><p>When Sylvain received his love letter, he was instantly filled with love. He became increasingly excited the more he read and he jumped for joy when Felix stated he wouldn’t be much longer to return. His enthusiasm was starting to become overbearing for the people who were employed under him. It was one thing to gush over the letters, but it became unbearable when he would not shut up about Felix coming home. Most of everyone, especially his knights, would avoid in every instance they could. He paid no mind to it and talked off many ears of other people. Every day since he received the letter, and when he had downtime, he would wait by his front door so he could be the first person Felix could see when he returned. Always with a smile and always sing the song that his beloved wrote. The day he was said to arrive, Sylvain reread as many letters he had before falling asleep. </p><p>It was late at night when Felix arrived. He smiled as he walked through the estate trying to find his love. He found him in the first place he looked, sleeping in their room, at his desk. He grabbed him, carrying him to their bed. Felix covered him in the blankets, making sure he was comfortable, before grabbing some clothes so he could take a quick bath. He placed Sylvain’s head in his lap as he started to sing a familiar tune. He shifted around, moving his arms around his waist and placing his head on his chest. Good, his heart was still beating. </p><p>“You’re home earlier than expected,” Sylvain said in a low, groggy tone. </p><p>Felix snorted. “Yeah, and I’m happy to be home.” </p><p>Sylvain pulled him closer, holding him tight. Felix missed these quiet nights. Cuddling the man he loved, being embraced by him, feeling his warmth. It felt nice, relaxing...it felt right. Right where he belonged. And with Sylvain’s warmth, he was able to fall asleep. For the first time in forever, Felix was able to fall asleep instantly, it felt refreshing. It was the best night of sleep he had in a long while. </p><p>Unusual as it was, Sylvain was the first one to get up in the morning. His Little Blue Giggle usually was the first one up. He would be in the training grounds, leaving him in the dust, by now. It was a sight to behold watching Felix sleep. He was like a cat basking in the warmth of the sun. Sylvain leaned down to give a light kiss on Felix’s forehead only to wake him. That wasn’t something he wanted to do. </p><p>“Morning sleepyhead,” Sylvain said softly. </p><p>Felix grunted as he took a hold of his Little Ray of Sunshine. </p><p>He laughed. “You want more sleep, don’t you? Don’t worry, I’m not going anywhere.” He started to lull him back to sleep. </p><p>No Gautier knight, no maid, no kitchen staff, no one saw the two of them for the rest of the day. The next few days everyone saw the two stick together, spending it together, whether it was for a date, training, or planning their next move dealing with an uprising near the Fodlan and Sreng borders. Always together, inseparable, like when they were children. </p><p>“Hello, My Love,” Sylvain said. </p><p>“Hello,” Felix smiled. </p><p>“Are you almost done repairing your sword?” </p><p>Felix moved a whetstone back and forth a couple of times before placing it next to him. He sheathed his sword and stood up to look at his husband. “I’m done.” </p><p>“Oh good!” Sylvain beamed. </p><p>“What’s going on?” </p><p>“I’m going to take you on a date!” </p><p>“Shouldn’t we focus on the matter at hand? The bandits.” </p><p>“I know you want to get this job done as soon as possible, but we are carrying out the plan in a couple of days.” Sylvain looked at Felix’s contorted face. “You agreed to this plan and it’s set in stone so you can’t change it.” </p><p>Felix grunted in irritation. He was right and he couldn’t do anything about it. </p><p>“Get changed! We are going into town. I’m going to surprise you!”</p><p>“Sylvain,” he sighed. </p><p>“I know, I know, you don’t like surprises. Trust me on this. You’ll love it!” </p><p>Felix let out a faint smile before giving Sylvain a kiss on his lips. It didn’t take long before him to change and meet back up with his husband. The two of them rode far into town, where a sports fest was being held. It brought back memories to Felix. When they were children, he, Sylvain, Ingrid, and Dimitri would come to these every year. Only if the other two were here, but it was only Felix and Sylvain. Felix both loved being here and he hated it. The warm memories that were covered in bloodstained hands filled his head.<br/>
Sylvain hugged Felix from behind and started to sway him back and forth. “There is nothing we could have done to save them.” </p><p>Felix breathed out. “I feel as though I could have done something.” </p><p>“So could I, but you know as well as me, you can’t bring back the dead. It’s what you’ve constantly said to everyone, especially your father.” Sylvain said. There was nothing he could say to wash away their regrets. “Live on. It’s the only thing you can do for them. That’s the best you can do.” </p><p>“Yeah.” </p><p>“Now come on, let’s enjoy today.” </p><p>Felix followed Sylvain to the horse races. Sylvain laughed loud when his husband couldn’t get on a horse. He could tell it’s been awhile since he rode one by himself. He laughed, even more, when Felix became frustrated with the help he had received getting a top of the horse. In every race, they competed against each other and everyone who participated, Sylvain would always win. After the horse races, and for the rest of the day, they walked around town watching greyhound races, show jumping, hurling, everything that they used to participate in when they were children. </p><p>Sylvain stopped by a vendor, buying something for Felix. “Here,” he said, handing him a gift. </p><p>“A journal?” Felix questioned. </p><p>“Yeah. I’ve been with you long enough to know you’re better at expressing yourself on paper. I thought I would get a journal to write them all out, especially words you don’t want anybody but me to hear.” </p><p>Felix smiled, giving him a kiss. “Thank you.” </p><p>Sylvain took a deep breath. He wanted to ask one question he knew that Felix didn’t want to answer, but he had to know. “Felix, after this, will you stay?” </p><p>He sighed. He knew this discussion was going to come eventually, though he knew that he couldn’t avoid it forever. “I will,” he replied after a few seconds of silence. “I will stay after this mission,” he said in confidence. </p><p>Sylvain’s frown flipped into a smile that was warmer and kinder than the sun’s ever will be. He picked up Felix twirling him around. He heard his irritation and placed back on the ground. </p><p>“With a smile like that, I can’t stay mad at you,” he sighed. </p><p>His smile only grew bigger. </p><p>“Hahaha, your face looks so stupid,” he laughed. </p><p>Sylvain started to laugh which prompted Felix to laugh even more. He stopped to watch the man he loved laugh uncontrollably. It had been so long since Sylvain had seen him laugh like this. Maybe thirty or so years since he has seen this sight without someone getting seriously injured. It was a fantastic sight to see. When Felix caught his breath, Sylvain pulled him close to give him a kiss. Neither Felix nor Sylvain stopped kissing each other, and when it was time for them to stop, no more words were spoken. </p><p>They rode back home in silence. They ate in silence. Bathed in silence. The only sounds that were made were when they were in bed where Sylvain hummed Felix to sleep. He cuddled and held him close. He was cold, he always had been, but he wouldn’t change it. </p><p>After a couple of days of preparations, Sylvain, Felix, and a few of the Gautier knights headed to the border near Sreng. There were plenty of bandits there, but there wasn’t enough to overwhelm any of them. Most of the day was spent putting an end to the bandit group. Felix, Sylvain, and the knights lived, only getting nicks and bruises. Nothing too serious. That night everyone headed back home. With a few hours left to spare before going to bed, Felix headed to the training grounds to train. </p><p>“Always training,” Sylvain said. “That’s never changed.” </p><p>“No. It never will.” </p><p>“I’m worried that you might die training,” he said, placing his hands on his sword arm. </p><p>“Heh, maybe so. At least it’ll be here with you.” </p><p>Sylvain smiled. “Do you remember…” </p><p>“Our promise? How could I not? I remember our childhood well.” </p><p>“And it…” </p><p>“It was also in our vows. Sylvain, I’m not leaving. Not unless I have to. Even if I were to leave, I will come back.” Felix smiled, giving him a kiss of reassurance. </p><p>Sylvain’s heart felt warm and full. He knew Felix was telling the truth, even if a part of him knew that he was going to leave soon. And if he was going from place to place again, he knew Felix would send him letters, journals worth of love. He knew he was going to be in his heart. Sylvain took hold of Felix’s face and started to kiss him all over. </p><p>“Hahaha, Sylvain, stop,” he laughed. </p><p>“No,” he kissed some more. </p><p>“Sylvain!” </p><p>“One more,” he said, kissing his lips. </p><p>“Since you won’t leave me alone, you can train with me, you fool.” </p><p>“Fine, fine.” </p><p>Sylvain grabbed his lance and sparred with Felix for a few hours before they took a bath and went to bed. Only if they could have more days like these. More days like Felix returning home, days like the date they had, more days sparring with each other. They could only wish. The next day, one of the royal knights came to ask for help from Sylvain and Felix. </p><p>“Margrave, Felix, I have to ask you something important on behalf of Their Majesties,” the knight said. </p><p>“What is it,” Sylvain asked. </p><p>“Both Noble Byleth and King Claude said you don’t have to do this if you don’t want to.” </p><p>“Spit it out,” Felix demanded. </p><p>“S-Sorry! They want your help to squash the rest of the TWISTED! They have been causing trouble again! They’ve been acting like bandits, pillaging, stealing, killing, and kidnapping people! Please, we ask for your assistance!” </p><p>Felix breathed in and exhaled. He knew that he had to leave. He couldn’t let this happen. Sylvain looked over to his husband and saw the determination on his face. He knew he was going to leave and there was nothing he could do to stop him. But he had to at least try to. </p><p>“I’ll go,” Felix responded. </p><p>“Felix!” </p><p>“I have to.” </p><p>The knight nodded, and by the looks of it, they knew Sylvain wasn’t going to help. They waited by the door for Felix when he was ready. </p><p>Sylvain followed Felix throughout the house. “Felix wait!” No matter what he did, he was always chasing after him. “Please wait!” </p><p>“What,” he asked, grabbing a few knives and his sword. </p><p>“You can’t leave!” Sylvain grabbed his weapons, only stalling him for a few seconds. “Felix please, you don’t have to go.” He sighed as he looked at him grabbing his weapons again. </p><p>Felix rummaged around their desks, looking for his journal. “And what, let these people run around and keep kidnapping people, destroying their lives and properties?” He found his journal, placing it in the satchel that was on his hips. </p><p>“Their Majesties said we don’t have to help them if we don’t want to!” </p><p>Felix looked Sylvain dead in the eyes. Both of them were about to cry. “Don’t you remember what happened to Flayn? I can’t allow them to do it again. I can’t just let them go.” He then walked off, making his way back to the knight. </p><p>“They have other capable fighters!” He yelled. “Like Shamir, Hilda, and Lysithea!” </p><p>Felix knows that and he knows that everyone is strong, but maybe, just maybe with his strength, it’ll be enough to end everything. </p><p>“Felix wait!” Sylvain ran after him. “Please!” He watched as Felix and the knight walked out into the pouring rain. With one last-ditch effort, he ran after him. He grabbed his arm and turned him around. “Please stay with me,” he pleaded. </p><p>“Don’t you dare cry!” Felix saw Sylvain’s tears roll down his cheek as he felt the cold rain hit their faces. It only led him to do the same thing. “You can come with me.” </p><p>“You know I can’t. I have to protect my territory...our territory,” he said, pulling Felix in for a kiss. </p><p>Feeling his soft, caring lips, and feeling his warm breath against his own, Felix repeatedly pressed his lips against Sylvain’s, not giving him any room to breathe. Deep down in their hearts, in their souls, they knew this would be their last kiss for this lifetime that they spent together. Sylvain could only watch as his Little Blue Giggle walked with the knight disappearing into the heavy rain. He constantly reassured himself that he would come back. He knew that he would come back...one day. </p><p>Felix met up with Byleth and Claude, getting the rundown of what was going on. He looked over their plans on how to finally defeat these bastards. It was going to be a long arduous battle, almost like he was going to fight in another war. After every squabble, after every battle, after every council meeting, Felix could feel his heart becoming colder and colder. The only solace, the only warmth that he found was sending love letters to Sylvain, writing words of love and hatred he felt in the journal his beloved gave to him. </p><p>All the happy memories that he had, all the sad memories that he had, filled his head. They were slowly becoming dark and all the bloodstained faces, all the bloodstained hands, all the bloodstained swords were filling his blank mind. He knew that he didn’t deserve those memories, he only deserved to see the blood of the people he cut down and only see their faces. He was becoming more and more like Dimitri. </p><p>From one fight to the next, it became harder and harder to win. Everyone knew this would happen. Felix especially knew that, and even though he was losing sight of Sylvain, he would still be cautious when fighting. The promise he had was slowly slipping out of his hands and no matter how much it seeped out of his bloodstained hands, he would always try to catch it. No one was going to take it away from him. </p><p>This particular fight, it would cost him everything. He foolishly left himself open for someone to attack him. Felix placed his hand on his chest, feeling the blood flow down his body. Everything started to look blurry as he looked at his hand. He spit out blood as he collapsed to the ground, lying in a pool of his own blood. </p><p>“Syl...Sylvain...I’m sorry.” He muttered out as the salt of his tears filled his eyes before everything became black and he drew his last breath. </p><p>Years upon years have passed since Sylvain had seen Felix. His heart was warm when he received letters and the journal that Felix had sent him. But his heart also felt knives of pain when he read that his beloved was suffering when he was away. Sylvain never regretted his decisions, but not being able to be near Felix, whether it was to convince him to stay, or have the courage to go with him, was the only one that he had. He would wait for him everyday by his front door in hopes that he would return. He watched many springs, many summers, many winters go by before he never returned. Sylvain, foolishly, believed that his beloved would return home to him, even in his old age. In the distance, he saw people he had never seen before. Maybe his beloved Felix was amongst them, but that was not the case. </p><p>“Lord Sylvain,” one of the knights said. “We have a sword here for you.” </p><p>Sylvain shakingly held out his arms to receive the weapon and unwrap it. The hilt was gold and the blade itself was straight. It also had the Crest of Fraldarius on it. It could only mean that it was Felix’s. </p><p>“Oh, Felix,” Sylvain said shakenly as tears poured down his cheeks. </p><p>“We are sorry, sir.” </p><p>“It’s quite alright. I knew this was going to happen.” </p><p>Sylvain turned around, walked through the house, to the backyard. He stood before a tree with flowers growing near it. He placed the sword in the flowers before sitting under the tree. </p><p>“Do you remember all those winter nights,” he sang, shakily and low as he felt the cool summer breeze. “Sitting by the fire. All those snowball fights. Do you remember? All I did was watch you go,” he last breathed. </p><p> </p><p>Felix woke up in a cold sweat from a nightmare that had been recurring. Because of these nightmares, he would wake up in the middle of the night and he would get very little sleep, if any sleep at all. He had dreams of times where he was in a war, or he was a child playing with his friends, or relaxing under a tree after a long training session. And in every dream, there was this one boy he always hung out with. He was a couple of years older than him, taller than he was, had red hair and brown eyes. He could see him, hear him so vividly, but he never knew his name. He would play with him on summer days, playing in cool waters, training with each other in a field. And every time that Felix would wake up from these dreams, these nightmares, his heart always felt heavy, it always hurt, it always ached for those days to come back. </p><p>He sat up, taking a hold of his clock, it was three in the morning. He sighed, knowing that he wasn’t going back to sleep. Felix got out of bed, walking to the kitchen to find his brother, Glenn, on his laptop doing who knows what. Ignoring him, he put some leftovers into the microwave. Once it was done, he sat on the countertop and ate his food while he tried to decipher all the nightmares and dreams that he had. What could they possibly mean? </p><p>“Why are you up,” Glenn asked, finally realizing that Felix was in the room.</p><p>“Took you long enough,” he mocked. </p><p>“Oh sorry that I’m studying real hard to pass a bar exam and told my little brother that I wouldn’t have time for him for the next couple of weeks,” he said sarcastically. </p><p>“Ha-ha.” </p><p>“Anyway, nightmares again?” </p><p>“Yup.” </p><p>“Did you get any new ones?” </p><p>“Nope.” </p><p>“There are a bunch of letters and journals in the attic. It might help.” </p><p>“What? Why do we have letters and journals in the attic?” </p><p>“Beats me. Read the information, maybe it’ll give you the answers that you’re looking for.” </p><p>“Stop patronizing me.” </p><p>Glenn smirked as he watched his brother wald out of the kitchen. “Hehhehe, maybe I should have not told him to go to the attic until the morning. This is going to be fun in the morning.” </p><p>Felix grabbed his phone from his room and made his way upstairs. He pulled on the string to pull down the ladder. He freaked out a little when the ladder made a loud creaking sound. He looked around and let out a sigh of relief, no one was woken up. He turned on his phones’ flashlight as he walked up to the attic. It was filled with boxes of letters and journals. Felix didn’t know where to start, there were so many boxes. Why do they even have these? </p><p>He started with the box closest to him. As he slowly started to read, he slowly started to feel his heart become heavy. It felt as though his heart ripped apart. It felt like these letters were meant for him and it only hurt him more when he couldn’t figure out who wrote them. He couldn’t remember who, but he can remember the warmth, the happiness, and the love that was put into the letters. Every last one of the letters he read were like knives to his heart. And with every letter that he read, he felt like he was stabbing the person in their heart. It all felt terrible. </p><p>The next morning, Rodrigue walked out of his room only to be confused as to why the ladder to the attic was down. He walked up the steps to find his youngest child asleep on the ground covered with paper. He sighed in irritation as he picked his son up. He placed him back in his room where he could rest properly. It was one in the afternoon by the time Felix truly woke up. He yawned as he walked out of his room and back to the kitchen. He heard his father scold him and his brother passed out at the table, nothing new. He grabbed a plate of food that his mother made, and walked back to the attic. </p><p>Before he fell asleep at the end of the night, he read a fourth of letters. He couldn’t believe there were so many love letters and he wanted to read all of them. Felix spent the next day feeling his heart be torn into pieces. He stopped reading, his heart couldn’t take much more. He put all the letters that he read, back into the boxes, labeling them, and placing them in a corner of the attic so he knew that he already read them. As he shifted around, a couple of journals and books fell to the ground along with a gold wedding ring. Felix inspected it, finding that it was engraved with the words “Little Blue Giggle.” No one called him that but his family. He left the attic, hunting down Rodrigue. </p><p>“Dad, why do you have a wedding ring with my nickname on it,” Felix asked irritably. </p><p>“I don’t know,” he replied. </p><p>“What do you mean you don’t know?” </p><p>“It was something my mother gave me. She said something about it being a family heirloom.” </p><p>“Why didn’t you give it to mom?” </p><p>“I wanted to give her a ring from my heart and it didn’t feel right giving her this one. When I look at it, the ring feels like it was given from someone who promised someone they would return but never did.” </p><p>Felix became confused by the last of his father’s words. They felt all too familiar. He foggily remembers telling someone he would return only to lie about it. </p><p>“I have no need for it. You can keep it if you want.” </p><p>“Thanks,” he said softly. </p><p>Felix placed the ring on one of his fingers. He walked back to his room and laid down on his bed. He stared at his hand. “It didn’t feel right” rang through his ears. It felt right when he wore it. Now he just needs to know who gave it to him. He soon started to sing a song that he would hear in his sleep. While singing it, he was able to sing himself to sleep and within his dream, he saw a man stand before him, promising him something. He was smiling and crying tears of joy. Felix could hear himself promising the same thing the man had said to him and promising that they would be at each others’ sides until the day they die. Everything about this dream was happy and warm. It was pleasant. </p><p>Felix woke up the next morning well rested for the first time in forever. Maybe he will get more sleep when he goes back to college. He started to pack his clothes, his books, his notebooks, and everything else he needed. When he was done, he walked up to the attic, grabbing a couple of boxes to take with him. He spent all day preparing for his drive back to campus. The next couple of days, he spent all day traveling and unpacking. Felix came back a day early so he spent the day reading some of the letters. He felt embarrassed reading them, how could someone be so mushy? </p><p>The next day, classes resumed and people filled the campus buildings. While walking through the hallways, Sylvain saw a certain man with blue hair and golden-brown eyes. Even if their eyes only met for a second, it felt like he has known him his whole life. He could start to feel his heart swell with pain while his eyes started to swell with tears. He wiped his tears away before he entered his classroom. It felt very odd, who was that man? Maybe if he got closer to him, he would know. Sylvain smiled and thought it would be a good idea to try to befriend him. </p><p>When classes were all done for the day, it was late and he went back to his dorm room to rest. He didn’t want to do much, not even go on a date with a pretty lady. Not that he could, though, his “girlfriend” dumped him over text because she found out that he “cheated” on him. He didn’t, he was just hanging out with Ingrid. He let out an irritated sigh, there was nothing he could have done about it. Sylvain looked over at his desk, seeing the book he brought with him. It was old and worn down by time. He placed his finger under the pages, where he left his bookmark, and opened the book. He took his time as he read through the book, feeling the love and warmth from the person who wrote it and left behind. Sylvain came across a letter where the paper was a bit more distorted than the rest. As he felt the pages, where tears once fell, he felt the pain and anguish, of not only the writers’ but an old pain he once knew. </p><p>With his pained heart, and the tears in his eyes, Sylvain fell asleep, he once again cried himself asleep. In his dreams, he saw a country blanketed with heavy, glimmering snow. He saw little children playing together, having a snowball fight. He could hear one child calling out to him to come play with him. He had dark blue hair and golden-brown eyes. Sylvain called out to him in return, rushing over to him to join the fun. After all the fun, him and the blue haired boy snuggled up in a blanket, sitting by a fire. It was warm, calming, but it was quickly burned by the ravages of war. Sylvain tossed  and turned in his sleep, slicing down enemies, seeing their blood and when he fought alongside the man he loved only to lose him after the war. He felt the pain as he waited for the man he loved to come home. </p><p>Sylvain woke up the next morning in a cold sweat and a heavy chest. He took a few moments to let out a few tears. He wanted those days of playing in the snow with the man he could barely remember. After he composed himself, he looked at his clock, realizing that he missed a class and he didn’t care much about attending his other classes. He yawned and stretched before he got cleaned up before going to get some lunch. Sylvain sat at a table, by himself, and ate a fish sandwich as he reminisced about the nightmares that he had. He thought about the man in his dream only to look up and see him a few feet away. His heart felt heavy. </p><p>For the next couple of weeks, he kept having nightmares of him and that man in war time. It became worse when Sylvain asked for more of those journals and letters from his father. His heart ripped into pieces when he received a gold wedding ring that was engraved with “Little Ray of Sunshine” on it. When he looked at the ring, he instantly remembered his wedding day in a past life. He was dressed in a black suit, standing in front of the blue haired man. Their hands were held together in braided chords, promising each other to be together forever. He put the ring away to hide the pain of remembering the memories of always waiting for the man he could barely remember to come home. He couldn’t even remember his love’s name. </p><p>Sylvain walked off campus to get himself some lunch and while he ate by himself, he saw a couple of classmates walk into the building. It was Dimitri and the man in his dreams. His heart sank as Dimitri passed a glance over to him, giving him a small wave. After the two ordered their food, and against Felix’s protests, the two sat with Sylvain. Sylvain and Felix could feel their hearts break. </p><p>“Hello, Sylvain,” Dimitri greeted with a smile. </p><p>“What’s up,” Sylvain asked. </p><p>“Do you mind if me and Felix sit with you?” </p><p>“Fe...lix,” he softly said as tears rolled down his face. </p><p>Dimitri became confused when he saw his friend start to cry. He turned to Felix and saw that his head was turned away so neither of them could see his own tears. Dimitri had no idea what was going on. They sat in silence as they ate their food before walking back to campus in silence. </p><p>“W-Well,” Dimitri said nervously. “I should get going. I will see you both later.” </p><p>“Wait! What about the notes?!” Sylvain asked. </p><p>He turned around, yelling “I will give them to you later,” before hastily walking away. </p><p>Sylvain sighed, not knowing what to do, he walked away. </p><p>“Where are you going,” Felix asked. </p><p>“To my dorm room. Being near you hurts my heart.” </p><p>Felix felt his heart shatter as he watched him walk away. It didn’t feel good when he watched him leave. It felt like he was losing someone he loved. He sighed, who was he kidding he lost him before and it was all his fault. </p><p>The next couple of months, the two barely talked to each other. They only interacted with each other when they were with their mutual friends. And within the next couple of months, their dreams, their nightmares were only filled with one another. Soon, their dreams, their nightmares became clearer and clearer. They were memories of a past lifetime they once shared together. </p><p>After everything, it only made Felix avoid Sylvain even more. At every chance they got to be with each other, Felix refused to be around Sylvain. It only added to their pain. Many nights Felix wondered if he deserved to be near Sylvain. Many nights he wondered if he would ever forgive him for never returning. Many nights he wondered why he still cared. Many days Sylvain tried to be near Felix to get answers. Many days Sylvain spent thinking what he could to get Felix to notice him. Many days Sylvain spent wondering if he loved him. One day, Felix didn’t have much of a choice to face his feelings. It was thanks to a couple of their friends shoving Felix into Sylvain’s room and leaving him there. </p><p>Sylvain let out a sorrowful sigh, feeling tears welling in his eyes. “Why won’t you talk to me.” </p><p>“I left you many times, hurting you each time,” Felix replied, crying himself. “Do you really think I deserve to be with you?” </p><p>“Felix,” he said softly, tenderly placing his hand on his cheek. “I’ve waited many lifetimes for you. We were born again so we could be together,” he said, finally crying. “After all the hell we went through, after all we went through,” he choked, “our will to be together brought us back so we deserve to be at each other's sides.” </p><p>With every word he spoke, Felix could tell Sylvain was wearing his heart on his sleeve. With his words, his tears dripped onto Sylvain’s hand. He pulled it closer to his lips, gently kissing his hand. His lips were soft and tender as he felt it against his skin. Sylvain pulled Felix closer, giving him a kiss before any of his doubts took control of him again. At the end of the night, Sylvain’s head was on Felix’s lap and Felix was fidgeting with his hair. </p><p>“Felix,” Sylvain said softly. </p><p>“Hm,” he replied. </p><p>“Can you sing me your song?” </p><p>“It’s our song.” </p><p>Sylvain chuckled. “Can you sing all of it?” </p><p>Felix smiled. “Do you remember all those winter nights, sitting by the fire?~ All those snowball fights?~ Do you remember?~ I watched as you go!~ All I wanted to do was grow,” he sang. He let out a breath. “With you!~” He looked down at Sylvain to see his smile. “Do you remember all those summer days outside in the waters,” he sang as Sylvain around. </p><p>He moved his arms around his waist, placing his head on his chest to feel the vibrations of his song and to listen to his heartbeat. </p><p>“We would play,” he paused to breathe, “for hours. Do you remember?~” Felix’s voice became a little lower and softer. “Was it something I said?~ Was there something I could’ve said?~ I want you near me!~” </p><p>He stopped singing when he thought Sylvain fell asleep. </p><p>“Why did you stop,” he smiled. </p><p>He smiled softly. “I love your eyes!~ I love your smile!~ I love your laugh!~ Please don’t go,” he sang again. He took one last breath before he sang the last bit of the song. “Do you remember those spring evenings?~ Riding horses, picking red roses!~ Do those have meaning?~ I will let you go!~ I love you!~” </p><p>Sylvain’s heart filled with warmth when he finished the song. Their song. </p><p>“Hey Felix?” </p><p>“Yes?” </p><p>“Will you marry me?” </p><p>“Sylvain,” he said, letting out an irritated sigh. </p><p>“What?” He chuckled. </p><p>“We haven’t dated in this lifetime.” </p><p>“You are going to make me wait even more?” </p><p>“You won’t be since we are together.” </p><p>“Hehehe, true. Fine, we’ll date some more before we tie the knot.” </p><p>“Thank you,” Felix said, giving him a kiss on his forehead. </p><p>Many months later and many dates later, the two were constantly making wedding arrangements, making sure everything for their big day was perfect. Their wedding day was a nice, cool, and a fresh day after an early morning rain. The leaves have changed from bright green to bright red, yellow, brown and burnt orange as they littered both sky and earth. Every guest followed a path of grass, lavenders, and leaves to the altar where they were led to a field. Chairs were set up on the sides to leave an aisle for the grooms to walk down with a tree, with lights on it, used as an altar. </p><p>Before the wedding, the two shook off last minute jitters. So long they have waited to spend every minute together. So long they have waited to finally be together and not have to worry about waiting. With the last of the preparations complete, their ceremony started. Everyone stood up when both grooms walked down the aisle and when the music started to play. Sylvain smiled joyously when he saw Felix stand a few inches from him looking dashing in his navy blue suit. Felix did the same when he saw his beloved look stunning in a boysenberry suit. </p><p>“Dearly beloved,” Rodrigue said looking over to his son, giving him a smile. “Nothing brings me more joy to wed my son to the man he loves. Love is always everlasting and spans over many lifetimes, reaching to everyone, including these two.” Rodrigue smiled, looking over to his wife and his son Glenn. “Relationships are everlasting and bound by love. To be together means to love one another, to grow with one another, to face every hardship and to spend every moment of happiness together. Now please join hands.” </p><p>While Sylvain and Felix held each other’s hands, Rodrigue took out braided cords. </p><p>“In your vows, you said you will grow with each other, to feel each other’s pain and happiness, and the most important vow that you had was to die together,” Rodrigue said wrapping a cord around their hands for each vow that they had. “Was there anything either of you would like to say?” </p><p>“Sylvain,” Felix said softly, smiling at him, “I love you with my whole heart. I want to be by your side, to love you, to hold you, to care for you. I want to grow old with you and to die with you. You are my love, you are my home. I will stand by you for every lifetime we spend together.” </p><p>Sylvain cried tears of joy hearing his heart. </p><p>“Sylvain, would you like to say something to him?” </p><p>“Yes,” he smiled. “Felix, no matter what you put me through, no matter the pain, no matter the happiness, no matter where you go, I will forever be at your side. I love you with every inch of my body. I will die by your side.” </p><p>“Felix Hugo Fraldarius, do you take Sylvain Jose Gautier as your husband?” </p><p>“I do,” he smiled and blushed. </p><p>“And Sylvain Jose Gautier, do you take Felix Hugo Fraldarius as your husband?” </p><p>“I do,” Sylvain cried more tears of joy. </p><p>“Then you may kiss your husband.”</p><p>Sylvain and Felix kissed each other. They took a few steps away from each other, making their cords into a knot before they put on their engraved golden wedding rings. Everyone stood up, cheered and clapped as the two walked, hand-in-hand, down the aisle, walking into the nice autumn scenery.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I got to participate in the Sylvix Big Bang with radeeum and I really enjoyed participating in this bang with them! It was really fun and they drew some really lovely and amazing art for this! Also, the lovely ava-artist14 on tumblr beta read this for me!</p><p>Here is the art that was drawn by the lovely radeeum: https://twitter.com/radeeum/status/1294665750683164672</p></blockquote></div></div>
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